Tuesday, January 5, 2010

New Year 2010!

Many of you do not know this . . .  but I am married . . .  I was married young and I am still the age of many college students . . .  but marriage and living in the real world has taught me more than I ever learned from school.  I really believe that I have a distinct and unique perspective on life in America and the Christian culture here . . . .  because I believe I have been on both sides of the fence . . . in a way.  I have been on the skeptical side of the fence for many years . . .  I have been on the doubting side of the fence . . .  I have been on the moral and "sophisticated" side of the fence . . . or more like 'moral and successful' side . . . . I have been on the side of the street where girls and boys grow up in gangs and with the only they  . . . and even I could seem to get back at the world was to lash out with words . .  or with raw emotional physical destruction . . . . but nothing can ever really take the pain away from not only having no family  . . .  but also growing up in a violent, abusive, and many times life threatening environment . . . . .  and  . . . I have also grown up with the thought that I did not understand why it was so hard to believe in God . . . or wondering what it was even like to have a spiritual renewal experience of my very own.  

Well sometimes things happen . . .  and GOD happens  . . . when you least expect it  . . .  and just like as in the story with the footprints . . .  you suddenly look back  . .  and you are amazed at the wonders God has performed in your life when you didn't even realize it.

AT this time  . . . right after Christmas  . . . and the new year 2010 already begun . . .  I think about all my Atheistic friends . . .  I think about my emotionally torn past . . .  and I think about my parents . . . not even knowing if they are even saved . . . I worry more than anything about whether I can help the people closest to me to learn about Jesus and be saved . . .  I mean who knows? . . .  The second coming could be any day now . . . . and STILL people come to my site just to mock me . . .  Seriously I am more saddened for them than for any personal attacks they make towards me.  Nothing can be worse than Hell . . . nothing . . . .

And at this time . . .  I also have doubts . . . like what am I even doing anymore . . .  where my life is going . . .  so many times I have even asked myself if I am kidding myself about this 'God thing'  knowing that my parents told me themselves they thought I was crazy . . . 

It's weird that the one thing that makes MY life complete . . . is the one thing that separates me from the majority of people on the planet . . .  the majority of whom are not Christians . . . do not take the question of the afterlife seriously, do not think about consequences or purpose to what is going on in their lives at this exact moment  . . .  All they can think about is how their life choices will effect their personal comfort . . .  and THAT is what is accepted in society right now . . . and I'm sure has been accepted for a long long time . . . .

The holidays are very rough on me . . . so I ask that anyone reading this would PLEASE keep me in prayer . . . I am not good at asking this to people face to face right now . . . So I will leave it in God's hands . . . that whoever reads this post and decides to pray for me . . . . I'm sure that is just the right person I need to pray for me . . . .

You see . . .  my marriage to a believing and professing Christian has caused a rift between me and my former friends and family . . .  and it has saved me from an abusive environment . . .  Somehow . . .I believe that whether or not I am able to help close this rift  . .  the least I can do is try to help close the rift between Christians and Atheists here in America and around the world . ..  especially those that I relate to  . . . those who still have the most hope and window of opportunity to come to understand each other . . .  the youth of our generation.

And so I can only pray that someone will reach my own family and friends . ..  but at the moment I cannot . .  and I am not emotionally able to . . .  It has been killing me inside . . . But I'm going to have to leave it in God's hands . .  and perhaps I will help reach someone reach a member of someone else's family that no one else could reach.

The reason I believe so strongly in talking about Creation Science . . .  is because . .  Science is like a god to this world to Secularists and Atheists . . .  and science is something people know to be good and helpful . . .  science is something people can relate to . . .  If we can take this jumping off point and run with it . . .  just like Paul did with the 'unknown god' with the Greeks . ..  perhaps we can reach some people with the truth that has saved us . . . the Saving faith in Jesus Christ our Lord.